Tag Archives: self-sabotage

Week 11 – Appearances DO Matter: The Eight Appearance Principles

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“Attractiveness is not necessary for success, but appearance IS .” ― Max Simon


When I was teaching career transition at Bow Valley College, one of the sayings we would emphasize to the students was: “If you look like you belong in the room, then you only have to convince people to listen to what you have to say. However, if you don’t look like you belong in the room, you have to first convince people that you do belong in the room, and then convince them to listen to what you have to say.”

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Looking like you belong in the room saves a lot of time and energy!

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This might seem overly simplistic for a success blog, (and I am by no means perfect) but I am constantly amazed when I go to networking events how many people look , as one of my colourful friends would say, “slapped together with duct-tape and a glue gun”.

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While, as Max Simon says above, attractiveness is not necessary for success, appearance is. Our appearance is a reflection of our self-care.  Our appearance conveys CRUCIAL information. It conveys what we think about ourselves. It conveys how much we value ourselves and what we think we are worth.  And that translates into what OTHERS think of us and what others think we are worth. Let’s face it. Humans DO judge a book by its cover.

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Which office would you prefer to do business with? Photos is from www.asimpleplanconsulting.com

Which office would you prefer to do business with? Photos is from http://www.asimpleplanconsulting.com

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Week 6 – Five Ways to Stop F’ing Yourself!

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“Those who say life is knocking them down and giving them a tough time are usually the first to beat themselves up. Be on your own side.”  ― Rasheed Ogunlaru

I bet the title REALLY got your attention! In a recent offering of my “Your Best Year Yet” Workshop, my friend and colleague, Betsi, shared with our group that she constantly guards against what she calls “Betsi’s Five F’s”. These five F’s usually go hand-in-hand with self –criticism. The five F’s demonstrate where we are beating ourselves up, and always show us where we are “fighting” against life (rather than living in the flow of Life—Flow is an F of a different kind! )

Successful people have very low levels of self-reproach. They learn from challenges and mistakes, forgive themselves (another F) and move on. They don’t waste their precious energy and resources on beating themselves up.

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